all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize