yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
I just want to let you know it was a unanimous decision that we would eat you first if we ever turned into cannibals, we figured with all the bacon you eat you may taste like it. It's a chance we are willing to take with your life...don't forget that we love you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize