What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
its like my vagina has this homing beacon out to all the guys saying "come find me, i havent been shaved in weeks"
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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