if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
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Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
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You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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