If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
