Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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