I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize