she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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