i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
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