can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
Randomize
