I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
just found out that she named her cat after me.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
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