Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
Worst case scenario, I put a giant cork in your vagina so you don't give birth before my birthday
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
