I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
oh my god. my mom just found my pipe. she thought it was a dildo.
like i said, there should be a sitcom about your family.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
