i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
Her parents are celebrating she found someone so well endowed.
Will there be champagne when they see the pay check?
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Randomize
