One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
