Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
