why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
