OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Randomize
