Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
The adults are the big ones right?
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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