I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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