yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
I just don't fit in here. The other wives are ten years older and have kids!
Well, you chose trophy wife of a 35 year old over college. Sit in your suburban soup and stew.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize