Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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