Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
its not stalking. its research.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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