Today I realized that I've had whole drunk relationships with people. And sober me has and wants no part in it.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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