I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
These 19 People Are Into The Grossest Sex Fetishes
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
People Weigh In On Whether It’s Okay to Bang Your Roommate
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.