I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I fucking hate tequila. Tequila makes me hate pants.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.