my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
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I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
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I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
Pants are for mortals
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
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