never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
