Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
