Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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