We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
