I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
First night in my new place, I had to get drunk to get used to the idea of shitting in a new toilet
Randomize
