i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize