we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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