If that was your dad, he is hot
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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