what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
