who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
