For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
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