I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
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