Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize