The maid of honor just puked.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I've never heard "I will drown your mother in vanilla pudding" as an insult before, and then last night happened.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Randomize
