so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
Did I mention I should never take 5 Xanax and drink?
I sort of figured that out when I found you sitting on the roof of your house saying we could get in through the skylight while I called the locksmith.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
The bar tenders gave me the number for a "taxi"... It's just a dude with a van. In retrospect, pretty sketchy. Robert was cool though.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
