U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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