If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
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