wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
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