he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
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