tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize
