operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
