When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Randomize
