YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
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