no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Drake has all the answers
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Randomize
