VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
